Misfortune Cookies

I have always wanted to do a dark humored twist on the standard fortune cookie. I had long assumed that fortune cookies were a pain to make, so I had been putting them off for months. Finally, I made them and learned that yes, I was correct in my assumption.

They are an absolute chore to bake.

The recipe makes almost 50 cookies and I don't think I made it past 20. I was baking them 2-3 at a time and at 6 minutes a batch it adds up to roughly two hours of baking. Never mind how long it takes to create the batter circles and then form the cookies! Even as fussy as I can be about baking, I really don't have that kind of stamina.

Still learning the new lens, so bear with me.

Regardless of all the effort involved, they were just crying out to be created. I had to make my misfortune cookies.

You can too, of course. Provided you have the patience for these pesky cookies and a family who understands how weird you are.

Misfortune Cookies
from Martha Stewart's Cookies
4 large egg whites
1 cup superfine sugar
1 cup all-purpose flour, sifted
pinch of salt
3 tablespoons heavy cream
5 tablespoons unsalted butter, melted
1 teaspoon almond extract (I used an almond emulsion)

nonstick cooking spray
paper strips of doom


Pre-heat your oven to 400°F

Prep two cookie sheets with a generous amount of nonstick spray.

Since I do not have superfine sugar on hand, I made my own by assaulting granulated sugar in the food processor (a blender will also do the job) for roughly a minute. Feel free to do the same, just be aware that doing this often will dull your blades.

Using your stand mixer with the paddle attachment, blend the egg whites and sugar on medium speed until foamy (roughly 30 seconds). Add the salt and flour and blend for 30 more seconds. Add the remaining ingredients and mix to form a batter.

Space three single teaspoons of batter onto your prepared pan and spread each into a 4-5 inch circle using the back of a spoon. This is easier said than done, you'll understand when you try.

Bake the cookies for 5-8 minutes until golden brown.

Pull the out and working quickly, lift a cookie off the sheet with an offset spatula and onto a stack of paper towels (a cold counter top would set the cookie instantly). Curve the cookie into a loose tube slip in the paper fortune and fold the ends together to form the fortune cookie shape.

It may take some practice to get it just right, so practice on a circle of paper before baking the cookies. You will need master your cookie forming skills to turn them out before they harden (which is in seconds).

They were a lot of work, but the reward of fresh, crisp fortune cookies with wry messages was worth the hassle and burnt fingers... well almost.



The doom is best served hot, since these cookies go stale quickly.

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